Dead End Print

The new iPhone app, created by Pepsi to market their Amp energy drink, is being attacked by women’s rights groups, claiming that the app is sexist.   This app lets guys choose from about a dozen stereotypes of women, the app offers pick-up lines for each stereotype, and lets you post you conquests up on a scoreboard.  I don’t even know where to start, but I’ll try really, really hard.

Let’s first go after the women getting pissed off about all this.  Guys compete with each other over everything!  Goddamn, why the hell don’t you get that?  It ranges from how many horsepower our cars have, to how many women we’ve slept with!  Fuck, get the fuck over it!  If this is degrading to anyone it is the men that this app panders to!  Good lord, if you don’t want to be objectified, then just don’t be a fucking whore!!!  It’s that simple!!  We are going to pit our numbers against each other for as long as we live, nothing is ever going to change that!!  Yeah, it’s pretty fucking sad, but it’s what we do!  We let you be crazy in your own ways, let us have ours!

Now, to the dudes who are using this app, get a fucking life.  Seriously, you need a fucking iPhone app to figure out pick-up lines to get laid?  Damn, what happened to the days where you needed your own mojo to get ass?  Fucking Christ, is this app going to tell you where to stick your dick if you actually get a girl dumb enough to fall for this shit?  I should hope so, because you can’t seem to do anything else on your own!

There you have it.  Does anybody pick up what I’m putting down?  This world has become too sensitive for its own good.  People need to stop taking offense to every little thing that crops up.  Also, people need to find more important things to discuss than how many notches we have on our bedpost.  This world is getting dumber by the minute, and I think I’m growing a tumor.  I’ll be back after I’ve located a good oncologist.

Tags: app, humor, iPhone, Pepsi, score, sexist, target